Madam, you're making history, in fact, you're making me, and I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself

The Arab and the camel are inseparable. It's been said that and Arab would give up his wife rather than give up his camel. Personally, I haven't got a camel, but I think it's a great idea.

When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face. That's the price she has to pay.

Policeman: "A hermit eh? Then why's your table set for four?" Groucho: "That's nothing. My alarm clock is set for eight.

There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere.

Remember, the grass is always greener where you don't happen to be the neighbor.