Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.

A thing that has always baffled me about women is that they will saturate themselves with a pint of perfume, a pound of sachet powder, an evil-smelling lip rouge, a peculiar-smelling hair ointment and a half-dozen varieties of body oils, and then have the effrontery to complain of the aroma of a fine dollar cigar.

You're heading for a breakdown. Why don't you pull yourself to pieces?

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

Getting older is no problem. You just have to live long enough.

There was no need to inform us of the protocol involved. We were from Chicago and knew all about cement.