Here's to our wives and girlfriends...may they never meet!
All geniuses die young.
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bandages and adhesive tape.
Hey, when I said work fast, I didn't mean your friend, I meant the maid.
In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians, and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people.
Wives are people who feel they don't dance enough.