I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book . . . The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.

Home is where you hang your head.

All people are born alike - except Republicans and Democrats.

Next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you.

I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.

I have nothing but respect for you -- and not much of that.

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana