I did toy with the idea of doing a cook-book . . . The recipes were to be the routine ones: how to make dry toast, instant coffee, hearts of lettuce and brownies. But as an added attraction, at no extra charge, my idea was to put a fried egg on the cover. I think a lot of people who hate literature but love fried eggs would buy it if the price was right.

You're only as young as the woman you feel.

Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

This book was written in those long hours I spent waiting for my wife to get dressed to go out. And if she had never gotten dressed at all this book would never have been written.

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

Afraid? Me? A man who's licked his weight in wild caterpillars?

I hope they bury me near a strait man