A clown is like aspirin, only he works twice as fast.
She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.
I never go to movies where the hero's tits are bigger than the heroine's.
Why, I'd horse-whip you if I had a horse.
If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you.
I was born at a very early age. Before I had time to regret it, I was four and a half years old.