Be open minded, but not so open minded that your brains fall out.
Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.
I wish to be cremated. One tenth of my ashes shall be given to my agent, as written in our contract.
Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
The foods that are recommended today are as palatable as a steady diet of wet blotters.