You're only as young as the woman you feel.

Now that you're Secretary of War, what kind of an army do you think we ought to have?

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

Bel Air, I am convinced, was laid out by some diabolic sadist who deliberately decided not to use a compass or a surveyor.

Money will not make you happy, and happy will not make you money.

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today.

I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and you come home." Groucho Marx was never one to pass up an opportunity for a play on words and this occurs in his dialogue of the 1933 film Duck Soup.