I'd have liked to have gone to bed with Jean Harlow. She was a beautiful broad. The fellow who married her was impotent and he killed himself. I would have done the same thing.

Why don't you bore a hole in yourself and let the sap run out?

I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.

I met my wife on a ferry boat, and when we landed she gave me the slip

Oh, why can't we break away from all this, just you and I, and lodge with my fleas in the hills? I mean flee to my lodge in the hills.

I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it.

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him.