I hate London when it's not raining.

If you want to see a comic strip, you should see me in the shower.

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.

Even the intellectual crowd will have none of me. Physically, I look like one of them. Graying at the temples, I walk with a slight limp and wear thick glasses.

You know I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters?

One woman and one man might have been OK in your grandmother's day, but who wants to marry your grandmother? Not even your grandfather!

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.