I could dance with you till the cows come home. Better still, I'll dance with the cows and you come home." Groucho Marx was never one to pass up an opportunity for a play on words and this occurs in his dialogue of the 1933 film Duck Soup.

Given the choice between a woman and a cigar, I will always choose the cigar.

Humor is reason gone mad.

Before I speak, I have something important to say.

I married your mother because I wanted children, imagine my disappointment when you came along.

I was born at a very early age. Before I had time to regret it, I was four and a half years old.

Will you marry me? Do you have any money? Answer the second question first.