Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.

Do they allow tipping on the boat? - Yes, sir. Have you got two fives? - Oh, yes, sir. Then you won't need the ten cents I was going to give you.

With the possible exception of clothes, beauty salons and Frank Sinatra, there are few subjects all women agree upon.

Don't let the fear of the thorn keep you from the rose.

I know a member of one of New York's first families (first as you drive up Tenth Avenue)

Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the rest of your life

If we had some eggs we could have eggs and ham, if we had some ham.