Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.

I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me." "What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself?" "Sure she could. I just found that out too late.

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?

Mr.Blank's reputation as a card shark had preceded him. No one accused him of being dishonest, but on the other hand no one accused him of being honest.

I wish you'd keep my hands to yourself.

I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.