As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.

The difference between a politician and a snail is that the snail leaves its slime behind. Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.

I was born at a very early age. Before I had time to regret it, I was four and a half years old.

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of bandages and adhesive tape.

Whoever named it necking was a poor judge of anatomy.

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

I love to read. My education is self-inflicted