Since my daughter is only half-Jewish, could she go in the water up to her knees?

Remember, the grass is always greener where you don't happen to be the neighbor.

I know a member of one of New York's first families (first as you drive up Tenth Avenue)

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days.

Only if the computers really love each other.

Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you're always trying for a topper you aren't really listening. It ruins communication

I don’t have a photograph, but you can have my footprints. They’re upstairs in my socks.