I started smoking as soon as I went on the stage. I'd make cigars out of the Morning World when I was a kid.

Don’t ever underestimate the importance of money. I know it’s often been said that money won’t make you happy and this is undeniably true, but everything else being equal, it’s a lovely thing to have around the house.

We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands a woman. And behind her stands his wife.

We took pictures of the native girls, but they weren't developed. . . But we're going back next week.

It is impossible to design anything that is foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

I don't know. When I was born there was a nurse taking care of me." "What's the matter? Couldn't the nurse take care of herself?" "Sure she could. I just found that out too late.

Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot. I implore you, send him back to his father and brothers, who are waiting for him with open arms in the penitentiary. I suggest that we give him ten years in Leavenworth, or eleven years in Twelveworth.