We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

He doesn't get ulcers - he gives them.

If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope.

You have a nice personality, but not for a human being.

Now, the band that inspired that great saying, "Stop The Music!!"

A tough guy told me, "I'll bet you $10 you're dead." I was afraid to bet him.

I bought my wife a little Italian car. A Mafia. It has a hood under the hood.