We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

I think the world of you...and you know what condition the world is in today.

Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won't be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did

All my wife does is shop - once she was sick for a week, and three stores went under.

I was walking down the street, and I found a man's hand in my pocket. I asked, "What do you want?" "A match" "Why didn't you ask me?" "I don't talk to strangers."

There was a girl knocking on my hotel room door all night! Finally, I let her out.

The Doctor says, "You'll live to be 60!" "I AM 60!" "See, what did I tell you?"