I was playing golf. I swung, missed the ball, and got a big chunk of dirt. I swung again, missed the ball, and got another big chunk of dirt. Just then, 2 ants climbed on the ball saying, "Let's get up here before we get killed!"
Henny YoungmanZsa Zsa Gabor is an expert housekeeper. Every time she gets divorced, she keeps the house.
Henny YoungmanAll my wife does is shop - once she was sick for a week, and three stores went under.
Henny YoungmanA Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He burned his mouth on the exhaust pipe!
Henny Youngman