My wife has a keen sense of humor. The more I humor her, the better.
I know a guy who had his doctor say, "Take some weight off, go to a health club." The man lost 20 pounds in one week! The machine tore his leg off!
I'm offended by political jokes. Too often they get elected.
If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.