Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
The hotel I'm in has a lovely closet. A nail.
A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, "Are you comfortable?" The man says, "I make a good living."
My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
A tough guy told me, "I'll bet you $10 you're dead." I was afraid to bet him.
I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.