I've been married for 49 years. Where have I failed?

How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put 'page 2.'

I have a lovely room and bath in the hotel. It's a little inconvenient, they're in two separate buildings!

My wife lost all her credit cards, but I'm not going to report it. Whoever found them spends less than she does!

Take my wife... Please!

I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, "Which way do I go?" But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...

My wife drives the wrong way on a one way street. The cop pulled her over and asked, "Where are you going?" My wife said, "I must be late, everyone is all coming back!"