Another drunk goes up to a parking meter, puts in a quarter, the dial goes to 60. The drunk says, "Huh. I lost 100 pounds!"
If you had your life to live over again, do it overseas.
Was that suit made to order? Where were you at the time?
A bomb fell on Italy. It slid off!
I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
My history teacher was so old, he taught from memory.