I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.
I love Christmas. I receive a lot of wonderful presents I can't wait to exchange.
My wife is a light eater. As soon as it's light, she starts to eat.
I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.
Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?