"What's the latest dope on Wall Street?" "My son!"

Why are you hitting me, there is nobody behind us!

A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks, "Doc, how do I stand?" The doctor says, "That's what puzzles me!"

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started.

Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?

If a joke is too hard to visualize, I tell the young comics, then what the hell good is it?

My wife has a black belt in shopping.