His motto is "Love Thy Neighbor". His neighbor is an 18 year old hooker.

A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.

This man dresses like an unmade bed.

He had a defect, which to a comic might be fatal. He wasn't funny.

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.

All my wife does is shop - once she was sick for a week, and three stores went under.

Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.