Some people play a horse to win, some to place. I should have bet this horse to live.

I've got enough money to last the rest of my life ... as long as I die about four o'clock this afternoon.

All men are not homeless, but some men are home less than others.

You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready.

A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single!"

I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.

My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.