I know a guy who had his doctor say, "Take some weight off, go to a health club." The man lost 20 pounds in one week! The machine tore his leg off!
I have terrible luck. Last week my chauffeur ran off without my wife.
He is the only man I ever met with a seersucker face.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate.
His motto is "Love Thy Neighbor". His neighbor is an 18 year old hooker.