It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!
My room is so small, the mice are hunchbacked.
Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
Was that suit made to order? Where were you at the time?
My wife has a keen sense of humor. The more I humor her, the better.