A car hit a Jewish man. The paramedic says, "Are you comfortable?" The man says, "I make a good living."

The room is so small, when I put the key in, I broke the window!

My brother then bought 1000 Japanese cameras. They all go, "Crick".

My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!

My doctor grabbed me by the wallet and said,'Cough'

The patient says, "Doctor, it hurts when I do this." "Then don't do that!"

I don't mind when my horse is left at the post. I don't mind when my horse comes up to me in the stands and asks, "Which way do I go?" But when the horse I bet on is at the $2 window betting on another horse in the same race...