Farrah's dressing room was next to mine. There was a little hole in the wall. I let her look.

My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.

She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" "No, jump in!"

Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.

I was playing golf. I swung, missed the ball, and got a big chunk of dirt. I swung again, missed the ball, and got another big chunk of dirt. Just then, 2 ants climbed on the ball saying, "Let's get up here before we get killed!"

"Doctor, my leg hurts. What can I do?" The doctor says, "Limp!"

"Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears." "Don't answer!"