I miss my wife's cooking - as often as I can.
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
I bet on a horse at ten-to-one. It didn't come in until half-past five.
When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.
I don't believe in reincarnation, but what were you when you were alive?
I went out with a girl last night. She wasn't a Lana Turner. She was more of a stomach turner.