The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, "Mrs. Cohen, your check came back." Mrs. Cohen answered, "So did my arthritis!"

Was that suit made to order? Where were you at the time?

My wife loves to shop at Bloomingdale's. I bring her mail there twice a week.

You have a nice personality, but not for a human being.

A man goes to a psychiatrist. The doctor says, "You're crazy" The man says, "I want a second opinion!" "Okay, you're ugly too!"

"Doctor, my leg hurts. What can I do?" The doctor says, "Limp!"

A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single!"