A man goes to a psychiatrist. The doctor says, "You're crazy" The man says, "I want a second opinion!" "Okay, you're ugly too!"

She was at the beauty shop for two hours. That was only for the estimate.

Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!

A Polish man had his vasectomy done at Sears. Now when he makes love, the garage door goes up.

Let's get up here before we get killed!

A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.

A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started.