A man goes to a psychiatrist. The doctor says, "You're crazy" The man says, "I want a second opinion!" "Okay, you're ugly too!"

Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.

She has a wash and wear bridal gown.

The other day I broke 70. That's a lot of clubs.

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Last night I ordered a whole meal in French. Even the waiter was amazed - it was a Chinese restaurant!

Have you noticed that families on TV never watch television?