I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.

I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.

A Jewish woman had two chickens. One got sick, so the woman made chicken soup out of the other one to help the sick one get well.

Most marriage failures are caused by failures marrying.

Why does the New Italian navy have glass bottom boats? To see the Old Italian Navy!

My wife lost all her credit cards, but I'm not going to report it. Whoever found them spends less than she does!

I know a man in Ft. Worth with 100,000 head of cattle. No bodies, just heads.