A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman, "Can I park here?" "No" says the cop. "What about all these other cars?" "They didn't ask!"
I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him.
I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?
Anybody who thinks talk is cheap has never argued with a traffic cop.
Where did you get your haircut, the pet shop?
Is that your hat or are you wearing a cabana?