If my mother knew I did this for a living, she'd kill me. She thinks I'm selling dope.
You have the Midas touch. Everything you touch turns to a muffler.
What is a home without children? Quiet.
The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip.
I own a hundred and fifty books, but I have no bookcase. Nobody will lend me a bookcase.
My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.