Two kangaroos were talking to each other, and one said, 'I hope it doesn't rain today. I hate it when the children play inside.
My best friend ran away with my wife, and let me tell you, I miss him.
I'll never forget my first words in the theatre. "Peanuts. Popcorn."
A self-taught man usually has a poor teacher and a worse student.
I bought my wife a little Italian car. A Mafia. It has a hood under the hood.
A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.