I think the world of you...and you know what condition the world is in today.

The Doctor called Mrs. Cohen saying, "Mrs. Cohen, your check came back." Mrs. Cohen answered, "So did my arthritis!"

A Polish guy locked his keys in the car. It took an hour to get his wife out.

I've got enough money to last the rest of my life ... as long as I die about four o'clock this afternoon.

She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" "No, jump in!"

Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.

This man dresses like an unmade bed.