My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.

I asked a Jewish man, "Do you know where Michigan Avenue is?" He said, "Yes", and walked away.

We aim to please... You aim too, please.

She ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" "No, jump in!"

The more I think of you, the less I think of you.

A guy says, I'm so old that I forgot how old I am. An old woman says, I'll tell you how old you are. Take off your clothes and bend over. The man does this. The woman says, You're seventy four. The man says, How can you tell? The woman says, You told me yesterday.

I'll tell you how to beat the gambling in Las Vegas. When you get off the airplane, walk right into the propeller.