To be born in Kentucky is a heritage; to brag about it is a habit; to appreciate it is a virtue.
As I understand it, sport is hard work for which you do not get paid.
Golf - a young man's vice and an old man's penance.
A woman may have a witty tongue or a stinging pen but she will never laugh at her own individual shortcomings.
Middle age: when you begin to exchange your emotions for symptoms.
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.