You had to hate the Colonel a whole lot to keep from loving him.
A woman may have a witty tongue or a stinging pen but she will never laugh at her own individual shortcomings.
A funeral eulogy is a belated plea for the defense delivered after the evidence is all in.
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn.
If I wanted to go crazy I would do it in Washington because it would not be noticed
To be born in Kentucky is a heritage; to brag about it is a habit; to appreciate it is a virtue.