Some drink to forget, some drink to remember-me, I drink to get bagged.

Some drink to forget, some drink to remember-me, I drink to get bagged.

Most wives think of their husbands as bumbling braggarts with whom they happen to be in love.

If you have it and you know you have it, then you have it. If you have it and don't know you have it, you don't have it. If you don't have it but you think you have it, then you have it.

The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.

The Miami Beach audience is the greatest audience in the world!

Thin people are beautiful, but fat people are adorable.