You might be a redneck if your favorite T-shirt is offensive in thirteen states.

You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

When I was a kid, my parents had a 900-pound television on top of a TV tray. My dad's theory was, 'Let him pull it over his head a few times, he'll learn.'

You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.

You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!