If the veins in the back of your legs look like the street map of greater Pittsburgh, you ain't nobody's babydoll.

You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.

You might be a redneck if you're turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.

You might be a redneck if your grandfather completely executes the pull my finger trick at the family reunion.

The biggest thing I've learned is to listen to my own gut. I have learned to trust my instincts.

You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.

I say, If everybody in this house lives where it's God first, friends and family second and you third, we won't ever have an argument.