You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.

You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.

You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.

You might be a redneck if your birth announcement included the word rug rat.

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.

You might be a redneck if your classes at school were cancelled because the path to the restroom was flooded.