That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring.

You might be a redneck if your grandmother can correctly execute the sleeper hold.

You might be a redneck if every electrical outlet in your house is a fire hazard.

I used to say that whenever people heard my Southern accent, they always wanted to deduct 100 IQ points.

You might be a redneck if your most expensive shoes have numbers on the heels.

When you get to your third millionth frequent flyer mile, I think something snaps in your brain.

You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.