It's not my dreams that get me in trouble, it's what my wife dreams I did. My wife punched me in the middle of the night; I woke up and went Oww! What was that for?, and she goes I dreamt you were making out with Faith Hill. I said I wasn't dreaming anything! Send her over to my dreams, and we'll both be happy.

You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!

It's like cuddling with a Butterball turkey.

You might be a redneck if you think that the styrofoam cooler is the greatest invention of all time.

I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

As an actor, there was that freedom of not having to worry about lights or marks or other people. It was just going out there and having fun with the character.

I wish I could relate to the people I'm related to.