You might be a redneck if directions to your house include turn off the paved road.

Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication

You might be a redneck if...you think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.

[about sex and being married] It's like being the National Guard, we may not be seeing as much action as the front line, but we are living to fight another day.

I think for one thing, kids are a lot smarter now then we ever were.

You might be a redneck if you think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just misunderstood.

Do you know why it's so hard to solve a Redneck murder? 'Cause there's no dental records and all the DNA is the same.