You might be a redneck if you have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.

You may be a redneck if . . . you think you are an entrepreneur because of the "Dirt for Sale" sign in the front yard.

This happened to me last week. We're in the process of remodeling our house; we've been doing it for a while now. And we have the painters in, putting sheets up around the furniture, you know? And we have a piano, just a regular, up against the wall piano. One of the painters said to me, "Is that y'all's piano?" I said, "Nah, that's our coffee table, it just has buckteeth! Here's your Sign!

Little girls love dolls. They just don't love dolls clothes

You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.

You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!

You might be a redneck if...the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection.