If your working television sits on top of your non-working television, you might be a redneck.

You might be a redneck if you're a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.

We really didn't have the option of being couch potatoes when I was growing up. There were only three television channels and the only kid's programming was on Saturday morning. We always played outside until we could hear Mom calling us (not by cell phone but with her hands cupped around her mouth) that it was dinner time.

You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.

Between New York and LA, there's 200 million people that aren't hip, and they don't want to be hip.

You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.

You might be a redneck if...you've been on TV more than times describing the sound of a tornado.