Thank God I'm at that point in my career where I don't have to take stuff that I don't really want to do.

You might be a redneck if an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger changed your life.

You might be a redneck if there is a sheet hanging in your closet and a gun rack hanging in your truck.

We probably stagnate our children's emotional growth by not letting them have some separation from us.

My grandma's the most careful, safe driver in the world. You put her in a rental car, and she's doing doughnuts in the K-Mart parking lot!

If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass, you might be a redneck.

If your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home, you might be a redneck.