I really don't require a whole lot in life.

Redneck is: the glorious absence of sophistication

You might be a redneck if...Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.

Changing a diaper is a lot like getting a present from your grandmother - you're not sure what you've got but you're pretty sure you're not going to like it.

You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.

You have to change those diapers every day. When those directions on the side of the Pampers box say, 'holds 6-12 pounds' they're not kidding!

My whole career can be summed up with 'Ignorance is bliss.' When you do not know better, you do not really worry about failing.