Because criminals know that when they see a house with 2 foot tall grass, a dog on a chain, and an engine hanging from a tree, a gun lives in that house. And if you want to know what kind, just break in at 2 in the morning.
You might be a redneck if you watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips.
Nothing in life prepares you to be famous.
You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.
You might be a redneck if you go to a Tupperware party for a haircut.
You might be a redneck if you consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.